Subtle? Absolutely not. The “Kiss Me Under the Missile Toe” tee is a funny Christmas t-shirt built entirely on terrible judgment and aggressively dumb holiday humor. Cringey dad joke energy? Strong. Regret? Minimal. It’s festive, ridiculous, and somehow gets funnier the longer people stare at it.

Why you’ll love it:

• Funny holiday humor with peak dad-pun energy
• Soft, comfortable fit for parties and awkward encounters
• A sarcastic Christmas tee that fully commits to the bit
  • 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
    
  • Fabric weight: 4.2 oz./yd.² (142 g/m²)
    
  • Pre-shrunk fabric
    
  • Side-seamed construction
    
  • Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
    
  • Blank product sourced from Nicaragua, Mexico, Honduras, or the US

Perfect gift for:

• The friend who loves terrible puns way too much
• Anyone bringing chaotic energy to holiday parties
• Fans of funny Christmas shirts with zero sophistication

Size guide: